A kidnapping gone wrong turns into a
mass murder in an abandoned cottage in the middle of nowhere in this
British black comedy horror. That is literally the entire movie
summed up in 18 words.
We open with David (Andy Serkis) and
his brother Peter (Reece Shearsmith) in a remote cottage with a girl
tied up in the boot of their car. Their hostage turns out to be
Tracey (Jennifer Ellison), the daughter of a strip club owner, Arnie.
Arnie sends his bunglingly stupid son to transport the cash, knowing
he is in on the whole thing but has him followed by two henchmen who
never really get a chance to do anything useful other than be
stereotypical asian assassins. Stuff happens, Tracey gets free taking
Peter as HER hostage and they wind up in a creepy farmhouse. While
looking for a phone, Peter opens a trapdoor in the kitchen, letting
out a mutilated farmer who goes on a rampage and kills everyone.
Well. Everyone except Peter. He gets trapped in the cellar with the
body of the farmer and a cupboard/shelves combo unit on top of the
door.
What disappointed me about this title
was the fact that nothing really happened.
Sure there was mystery, suspense, gore and a few fight scenes, but
other than that, I wasn't really captivated in the way other movies
get me. The background of the farmer could have been delved into a
little further, or perhaps the club could have been utilised a little
more. All I know was that there was definitely something missing that
held this film back from becoming pretty damn good.
I'm
pretty sure that last part is terrible grammar, but I'm sure you get
the point.
What I
did enjoy was the fact that it wasn't pretending to be an
action-packed blockbuster, or a laugh-out-loud comedy, but something
else entirely. The characters didn't seem cheesy, something some
movies fail on hard, the 'villain' was believable and the horror was
real. The fact that everyone dies in the end was another plus,
something I always appreciate in movies like this. I know cliches are
there for a reason, but the skinny blonde being the only survivor of
a zombie attack isn't very likely when the film starts off with her
in a group with muscly guys and peeps who know how to use guns. I'm
not saying that skinny blondes can't handle themselves, and not
trying to be sexist, but this is something that appears in many
films. Also, the 'tough guy' of the film, David, standing no chance
against the farmer was another welcome sight. Something else that
usually is seen in cinema is that the good guys manage to put up a
fight before going down, where in real situations, it's highly
unlikely your average Joe could win a fist fight with a 6'4”
monster who feels no pain, let alone land a punch.
All in
all, a worthwhile film only missing a few things that's worth an hour
and a half of your time. -3 ski masks out of 5
